Author: mccoysnoise

BLACK LIVES MAT

As all who care are aware, a mural of the words, “BLACK LIVES MATTER,” which was placed on 16th Street in Washington, D.C., in 2020, in the wake of the murder of George Floyd, is being removed by the city, reportedly due to pressure being applied to city officials by Republican members of Congress.  I haven’t seen reports of widespread protest at the removal.

The irony of this note is that I don’t believe in identity politics.  I absolutely and viscerally believe in equality – the right of all of our people of every persuasion to be able to freely, fully, and peacefully use their gifts – but I am not convinced that we as a polity benefit from the artificial imposition of diversity.  You may correct me – I have not performed detailed research on the data – but it is my impression that although the affirmative action programs implemented since the 1960s have reaped great rewards in certain individual cases, they have not brought about the overall societal changes hoped for when they were initiated.  While I am not sure that I have ever been specifically aware of the BLM mural in Washington, D.C., one could not help but be aware of such memorials being created throughout the country after Mr. Floyd was killed, and I remember wondering at the time whether, despite the massive outrage all decent human beings felt at the brazen execution of Mr. Floyd, it was useful to single out the injustices done to any one group of our citizens so markedly.

So, I am surprised at the anger and foreboding I feel as the BLM mural is being removed in our nation’s capital.  Once the money had been spent to install it, it certainly wasn’t doing any harm, and its message was a positive one.  Removing it is incurring public expense that isn’t required from a structural standpoint.  One is merely stating the patently obvious when noting that these self-proclaimed Republican guardians of public coffers are baseless hypocrites who have no trouble wasting public funds when it suits their agenda.  However, the wasted expense is just as obviously but a drop in the ocean of the import of the issue.  Here, we don’t need to get bound up in a debate regarding the correct approach toward migrants who have admittedly crossed our border illegally.  Our government is Making America Great Again by deleting an expression of support for the wellbeing of a segment of our citizens.  Its concern for these citizens is literally being erased.

BLACK LIVES MATTER

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Not that concerned? 

Who’s next? 

It could be me.

It could be you.

What Will Be, Will Be: Redux

Something you and I absolutely agree upon:  I’m not that smart.  However, this post is entered in shocked reaction to a comment by MSNBC’s Morning Joe’s Joe Scarborough today, to the effect that legislators and financiers with whom Mr. Scarborough talks are stunned that President Donald Trump is actually doing … exactly what he said he was going to do during the campaign — now augmented by hints that Mr. Trump and Elon Musk are considering doing what Mr. Trump has always said he wouldn’t do:  tamper with Social Security and Medicare.  What follows are excerpts (all italics appeared in the original) from a post entitled, “What Will Be, Will Be,” entered in these pages six days after Mr. Trump’s election.  (If you care, scroll down to fill in the portions I’ve omitted here.)

“‘Shall we expect some transatlantic military giant, to step the Ocean, and crush us at a blow?  Never!  All the armies of Europe, Asia and Africa combined, with all the treasure of the earth (our own excepted) in their military chest; with a Buonaparte for a commander, could not by force, take a drink from the Ohio, or make a track on the Blue Ridge, in a trial of a thousand years.

At what point then is the approach of danger to be expected?  I answer, if it ever reach us, it must spring up amongst us.  It cannot come from abroad.  If destruction be our lot, we ourselves must be its author and finisher.  As a nation of freemen, we must live through all time, or die by suicide.’

  • Abraham Lincoln, January 27, 1838

…

I have always thought that the American presidency called for a fundamentally good person who was willing to take morally questionable actions to achieve a greater good.  It is clear that many Americans are willing to abide a man whom even a large share of his supporters concede is amoral in hopes that he will do good things.  [I am particularly struck by those Evangelicals who admit that they wouldn’t want Mr. Trump as a pastor but can abide him as president.  Granting that the Bible can be cited for just about anything anyone wants, one cannot help but pause at the seeming … let’s say, incongruity … that any such literalist Christians so readily disregarded Matthew 7: 17-18:  ‘Just so, every good tree bears good fruit, and a rotten tree bears rotten fruit.  A good tree cannot bear rotten fruit, nor can a rotten tree bear good fruit.’] It is what it is.

What comes next?

…

Over the next four years, I expect:  that Mr. Trump – already exhausted and mentally degrading – to become a figurehead for a radical reformation of our federal government by Vice President-Elect J.D. Vance, Donald Trump, Jr., and the MAGA zealots who have put together Project 2025; that all criminal charges now adjudged or pending against Mr. Trump will be dispensed with; that all of the convicted January 6th rioters will be pardoned; that many of Mr. Trump’s most prominent political and media critics will be prosecuted by the Trump Justice Department on trumped up (if you will 😉 ) charges … or otherwise pressured into submission; that MAGAs will pass measures that in fact if not in name will serve to disenfranchise Democratic-leaning constituencies; that many legal as well as illegal immigrants will be swept up in the Administration’s deportation initiatives; that MAGA-sympathetic generals will be appointed to lead the American military, and that at some point under their direction our armed forces will take action against peaceful American citizen demonstrators; that violence will increase against African Americans, legal immigrants of color, non-Christians, and Americans with untraditional gender and sexual preferences; that NATO will remain in name, but will have severely reduced effectiveness as America substantially limits its participation; that Russia will absorb at least Ukraine and possibly a number of NATO countries formerly members of the USSR; that Mr. Trump and his cohort will continue their approach of division and distraction; … and that — the bitterest irony of all — the gap between the American rich and those poor who consider Mr. Trump their Messiah will continue to widen.  (The cruelest joke will be that because of alt-right propaganda, most are likely not to even realize that Mr. Trump did nothing for them.)

…

If Mr. Trump and his minions actually effect the tariffs and tax cuts for which he’s advocated and bend securities laws to favor powerful oligarchs like Elon Musk, it doesn’t take an economics degree to predict that inflation, the deficit, and accordingly interest rates will soar and the stock market will drop; if they effect the mass deportations of illegal aliens he has promised, certain sectors of our economy dependent on illegal labor will crater, materially adversely affecting the entire economy; and that if they obtain the control over the Federal Reserve Mr. Trump seeks, global confidence in the dollar will plummet along with its value and hasten its abandonment as the world’s reserve currency.    

For clues as to whether the MAGA Administration will be willing, contrary to my deepest misgivings, to allow for a free and fair 2028 election, an early indication will be how the Administration approaches issues that do matter to Trump voters.  Ones coming to mind are the conservative shibboleths of a nationwide abortion ban, Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid cuts (there are a lot of Trump voters who benefit from Medicaid), and repeal of the now-popular Affordable Care Act without an essentially-like replacement.  In these areas, Mr. Trump, even in his obviously mentally and emotionally degraded state, is cannier than his doctrinaire followers.  If he or his MAGA cohort truly intend to subject their hold on power to the free will of all American citizens in 2028, they will abstain from any actions that they know will outrage their base.  A more ominous indicator of any anti-democratic intentions they may harbor will arise, if at all, after the 2026 mid-terms, if MAGA propaganda starts to stoke unfounded fears of civil unrest or insurrection.” 

I apologize for taking your time with an unplanned vent, particularly one which is little more than a repeat of what has already been entered here (although surrendering to such impulses is one of the perks of a site like this 😉 ). I am just having trouble grasping that the supposed sophisticates Mr. Scarborough referred to couldn’t see coming what was as plain as the noses on their faces.  I hope to post an entry in the not-too-distant future regarding the condition our traditional guardrails – those destroyed, and those remaining.  Keep your seatbelt on. 

On Lenten Fasting: Redux

[There is obviously much to address in our current state, but Ash Wednesday comes but once a year, and it is today.  I reenter a post from past Ash Wednesdays – and will very likely continue to reenter it on future Ash Wednesdays – because I find its teaching a more spiritual perspective than the traditional concept of Lenten denial.]

Today is Ash Wednesday:  in the Christian world, the beginning of Lent, the 40-day period of reflection and performance of penance for one’s sins in preparation for Jesus’ Passion and Death on Good Friday and Resurrection on Easter Sunday.  It is a time in which Christians have traditionally fasted – customarily understood to mean that one of faith will willingly bear the pang of hunger, or endure some other discomfort – so as to identify in a microscopic way with the Lord’s suffering.  Even so, I offer the following Scriptural description of another means of fasting by which one might embrace the spirit of Lent:

“Would that today you might fast so as to make your voice heard on high!

Is this the manner of fasting I wish, of keeping a day of penance:

That a man bow his head like a reed and lie in sackcloth and ashes?

Do you call this a fast, a day acceptable to the Lord?

This, rather, is the fasting that I wish:

Releasing those bound unjustly, untying the thongs of the yoke;

Setting free the oppressed, breaking every yoke;

Sharing your bread with the hungry, sheltering the oppressed and the homeless;

Clothing the naked when you see them, and not turning your back on your own.

Then, your light shall break forth like the dawn, and your wound shall quickly be healed;

Your vindication shall go before you, and the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.

Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer; you shall cry for help, and He will say:

‘Here I am.’”

 Isaiah 58:  4-9 

Я українець

kennedy youtube i am a berliner – Google Search

By this time, all who care have seen part or all of the bitter exchange that occurred in the White House Oval Office on February 28th between Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy and President Donald Trump and Vice President J.D. Vance.  To state what was blatantly obvious from the moment it was clear that Mr. Trump was reclaiming the presidency:  America is going to abandon Ukraine to Russia.  The minerals deal is equal parts transparent ruse and cruel prank.  In my lifetime, our nation has made foreign policy  blunders which have yielded terrible consequences, but as far as I am aware, each was undertaken by the given President, no matter how mistakenly, with the intent of protecting Americans’ freedom and that of others around the world.  What the Trump Administration is doing to Ukraine is akin to taking the side of a brutal rapist and demanding to be thanked by the victim. 

I don’t know Ukrainian, and thus am relying on Google to have translated accurately, that the Ukranian phrase I have cut and pasted here reflects my intent; but I am confident President John Kennedy wouldn’t mind my paraphrasing and embracing his imagery from over sixty years ago when I declare that all free people, wherever they may live, are citizens of Ukraine.  And therefore, as an American citizen living in America and as – at least, as yet — a free man, I take pride in entering here, “Я українець.”

DOGE and the Mark of Cain

“Cain said to his brother Abel, ‘Let us go out into the field.’  Now when they were in the field, Cain turned against his brother Abel and slew him. … And the Lord said, ‘What have you done? … [N]ow cursed are you in the soil which has opened its mouth to receive your brother’s blood from your hand. … [A] fugitive and a wanderer shall you be on the earth.’  Cain said to the Lord, ‘My punishment is too great to bear. … I shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth, and whoever finds me will kill me.’  But the Lord said to him, ‘Not so!  Whoever kills Cain shall be punished sevenfold.’  So the LORD put a mark on Cain, lest anyone should kill him at sight.”

  • The Book of Genesis 4:8, 10, 12-15.

The Genesis verses cited above were read worldwide at yesterday’s Catholic Masses.

I expressed a deep regret yesterday in these pages for the federal employees whose careers are being mindlessly destroyed by President Donald Trump “and his acolytes” – i.e., Elon Musk and his minions.  The Scripture passage made me reflect on the potential consequences for another group that I had not previously considered. 

If numerous reports I have seen are accurate, Mr. Musk is doing a large share of his culling of federal workers through a force of elite college graduates in their 20s.  Those of us with a little more seasoning realize that when you’re in your early 20s, it doesn’t matter how academically bright you are or what school you went to; you don’t even know what you don’t know.  These youngsters probably think that these heady times are going to last forever. But if rational democratic forces do stage a return at some point in the future, and the ways of Messrs. Trump, Musk, and their MAGA lot are cast aside, it almost certainly won’t affect Mr. Trump personally; he’ll be insulated by his Supreme Court’s presidential immunity ruling and grateful benefactors who will ensure that he has a cushy existence to the end of his days.  It likewise won’t affect Mr. Musk personally; he’ll be insulated by his fortune and will be able to live wherever in splendor for the rest of his days. 

It is Mr. Musk’s young vigilantes who have long lives ahead, and who won’t be protected by court rulings, fortunes, or benefactors.  It is these youngsters who will ultimately face the wrath of their republic.

The priest who said yesterday’s Mass chose to characterize the Lord’s action as one of mercy toward Cain – that He could have destroyed Cain, or let others kill Cain, but instead chose to let Cain go forth to walk the earth.  (Let’s put aside the obvious question as to whom Cain feared would kill him – after all, his parents were the first people, and he and Abel were their first children.)  Although I have very high regard for this priest, I was not so sure I agreed with his interpretation of the Lord’s action; I wondered whether the Lord didn’t instead punish Cain by ensuring that he had to wander the earth for his sin – as a “fugitive,” presumably for decades – when death might have been the more merciful sentence.

If the MAGAs aren’t successful in establishing an American Apartheid and these young Musk minions haven’t broken any laws, they, like Cain, will be left to wander the earth.  Given the enmity that Messrs. Trump and Musk have now engendered among so many throughout the democratic world, where will they be able to go to fulfill the potential they had the day that Mr. Musk first laid eyes on them?

While of no consolation to those whose careers they are ravaging, these young vigilantes may find that “DOGE” is ultimately their Mark of Cain.  Some, as they grow older and wiser and no matter the fate of the MAGA crusade, will find that it is indelibly branded on their psyches; on their souls.

A Sucker’s Bet

My taste buds never grew up.  I like what the average two-year-old likes.  When left to my own devices, I will often opt for Kraft Macaroni and Cheese (after all, it’s The Cheesiest  🙂 ) or Oscar Mayer baloney on bread (although these aren’t as good as those of my youth, since TLOML refuses to buy Wonder Bread, thus depriving me of the opportunity to build my body in 12 ways).  That said:  of all of the grotesque appointments consummated since Inauguration Day (a close friend noted to me recently that the only qualified person President Donald Trump has chosen seems to be Stormy Daniels), that which is perhaps the most aesthetically absurd although not the most important is Mr. Trump’s becoming Chairman of the Board of the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts.  His election is akin to me being named Chairman of the Board of the American Culinary Federation.

We regularly see reports that Democrats are “struggling to find their footing” as to how to respond to Mr. Trump’s policy blitzkrieg.  This is enough to make one blink.  Democrats should emulate MAGAs and alt-right media and KEEP IT SIMPLE:  POUND INFLATION and ELON MUSK.  If the economists one reads have any competence at all – you can take that one – inflation is not abating and Mr. Trump’s current and proposed tariffs will make it worse.  Probably sooner than later, some DOGE initiative is going to cost a swath of Americans some benefit they rely on.  Mr. Musk is more inherently unlikeable than former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton ever was, and look how Republicans were able to demonize her.  Democrats should strive to poison the general public perception of Mr. Musk – which will yield the side benefit of emasculating Mr. Trump.  (I was more than a little surprised to see last week that Mr. Trump – who is particularly attuned to television images – let Mr. Musk and Mr. Musk’s son in the Oval Office while Mr. Trump was meeting with reporters; it was not a good look for Mr. Trump, visually diminishing him while further elevating Mr. Musk’s profile.)  We’ll see whether the Dems — who since President Bill Clinton left office have seemed to believe that politics is, indeed, bean-bag — can actually mount an effective political counterattack.  (Of course, such efforts will only matter if Trump MAGAs permit free and fair elections in 2026 and 2028, which I doubt; a telling clue to their long term intent will be whether Republicans seek cuts in Social Security and Medicare – emotive programs for Trump supporters that could potentially adversely affect their fealty – in future budget negotiations.)

Mr. Trump’s pardoning of the Proud Boys and the Oath Keepers convicted for their actions in the January 6, 2021, insurrection has provided the President his own private Stermabteilung.

As the Trump Administration digs in, I am heartsick at the havoc being wrought by Mr. Trump and his acolytes on federal employees whose careers are being wantonly and indiscriminately ruined, on our citizens who had the sense to vote for Vice President Kamala Harris but will be engulfed in the commencing maelstrom, and on the compromised and the destitute lacking the bandwidth to even come to grips with what a Trump presidency portends for them.  At the same time, I am not nearly as distressed that the misperceptions of some Trump supporters will begin to rebound upon them.  Those technology oligarchs who have sought to curry favor with Mr. Trump in recent months (not Mr. Musk, who will be protected by his relationship with Russian President Vladimir Putin) haven’t studied the history of totalitarian regimes closely enough; ultimately, the Trump Administration will come for them and their organizations, and break them.  The admittedly more unfortunate cases will be those at the other end of the Trump spectrum. Although we will never know – the privacy of the voting booth being sacrosanct, at least up to now – if such could be determined, it would seem worthy of betting a dollar that each of the following will occur:  the impoverished mother, who voted for Mr. Trump because of the price of eggs, who loses her SNAP payments; the elderly farmer, who voted for Mr. Trump because he hates the Woke, who has a family member die because the hospital formerly nearest to him closed for lack of Medicaid revenue; the Latino male, who wouldn’t vote for a woman, who watches undocumented family members deported, never to be seen again; and the black male, who voted for Mr. Trump because he was so manly, who is gunned down somewhere by some police officer emboldened by Trump rhetoric.

I know.  You wouldn’t risk the dollar, even presuming the outcomes could be determined.  It’s a sucker’s bet.

The Trump Framework

I indicated not long ago that I had been considering a framework that would provide a context for the Trump Administration’s actions since January 20; upon reflection, I’ve decided there are two different overall strategies being implemented.  No attempt is made here to place all of the Administration’s blizzard of activities in one of the categories; those listed below are for illustration only.  Some of the Administration’s initiatives fit in more than one category.  If you agree with the gist, I leave it to you to place other Trump actions in one or more of the categories, and to add any additional categories you think I’ve overlooked.  Listing them from least to most malign:

Implementing Policy Initiatives.  Mass deportations of illegal immigrants, imposition of tariffs, enabling increased domestic drilling for carbon fuels, further tax cuts, and ending diversity initiatives in place via Presidential Executive Order are all policy initiatives that the President Donald Trump campaigned on.  He won the election.  Like them or not, none of his efforts in these areas appear to be beyond the lawful scope of the Executive Branch.

Hucksterism.  If willingly gullible ordinary MAGA citizens want to contribute to various Trump Organization financial vehicles because they believe such will – wait for it – Make America Great Again, or buy Trump cryptocurrency meme coins, Trump Cologne, etc., etc., etc., they should have at it.  [Authorities:  W.C. Fields and (apocryphally, at least) P.T. Barnum.]

Exhibiting Vindictive Toxicity.  Examples:  Mr. Trump’s order removing security details for former Trump Administration Secretary of State Mike Pompeo and former Trump Administration National Security Advisor John Bolton – both under threat by Iran due to their part in the assassination of Qasem Soleimani at Mr. Trump’s order – due to their criticism of Mr. Trump; Mr. Trump’s order that Mt. Denali be renamed, “Mt. McKinley,” a blatant slap at Alaskan indigent tribes opposed by a majority of Alaskans and both Alaska’s Republican Senators; and the unsubstantiated claim that Democrats and their “DEI” policies somehow caused the recent Washington, D.C. airline crash.  All petulant spasms.

I’d suggest that these first three categories collectively are intended to achieve a strategy that is pure Trump:  please your audience, make a quick buck off a sucker, and petty payback.

Undercutting Strategic Alliances.  Examples:  Deploying tariffs against our North American neighbors despite their adherence to a trade deal Mr. Trump negotiated in his first term; declaring that the Gulf of Mexico should be renamed, “the Gulf of America”; proposing to annex Canada; threatening to take Greenland (under the jurisdiction of Denmark, a NATO ally) by force; and suggesting that Gazans should be transported to Egypt or Jordan (irritating these U.S. allies in an extremely unstable region).  None of these actions served any purpose save to make our allies less amenable to any requests for assistance we might make in the future.

Dismantling the American Government.  Here’s a couple:  nominating grotesquely unqualified persons to run extremely complex and sensitive organs of the American government, such as Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth, soon-to-be Secretary of Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., and Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard; and the DOGE machinations.  These maneuvers create fear and disruption.  Although making government more effective is certainly within a President’s purview – Theodore Roosevelt made clear in his autobiography that he authorized quite a number of independent, unpaid individuals to improve federal government efficiency during his presidency — the measures Mr. Musk and his little Bobos are effecting toward our governmental structures are not those of a rational business person attempting to improve an organization’s processes.  I am confident that if/whenever Mr. Musk seeks to trim the workforces in his two operations that he actually understands – cars and spacecraft – he doesn’t indiscriminately give almost all of his full-time employees carte blanche to go with severance pay, or turn hiring and firing decisions over to neophytes, without regard to the impact on his operations.

Degrading the Rule of Law.  Here are a few:  Politically browbeating U.S. Senators to abdicate their Constitutional responsibility by approving abjectly unqualified Cabinet nominees; dismissing members of the Department of Justice and the FBI for conducting investigations and prosecutions that yielded sufficient evidence that grand juries returned indictments against Mr. Trump; executive orders to end birthright citizenship notwithstanding pretty darn clear language granting same in the Fourteenth Amendment; impoundment of funds and closing of federal agencies authorized by Congress; and, of course, the pardoning of those who either pled guilty or juries of ordinary citizens found guilty beyond a reasonable doubt of assaulting the Capitol on January 6, 2021.  Such attacks not only undermine faith in our system of government, but also undermine global confidence in our financial system, which draws much of its strength from world nations’ belief in the competence, integrity, and impartiality of our courts.

A lot has been made in recent days of the impending Constitutional crisis that will ensue if the Trump Administration defies rulings rendered against it in federal courts.  While the potential crisis is perhaps a new notion for many of our citizens, those with legal training are always acutely aware that our courts’ power is based upon the premise that those government officials with actual enforcement power will abide by their rulings.  Obviously, if it becomes clear that the Administration is willfully disregarding court orders, such will trump (if you will) all other manners by which MAGAs are undermining the American rule of law.  I will venture that the culmination of such a confrontation will occur if/when a majority of the U.S. Supreme Court, with three Trump appointees and a total of six conservative Justices, rules against a Trump initiative – and the Administration thereafter ignores the ruling.  Since the Court controls its docket, I suspect that there will be a temptation on the part of some Justices to only take the disputes which they believe will be easiest to rationalize in favor of the Administration, but it is going to be difficult to duck some impending Constitutional issues, such as birthright citizenship, in which the Administration’s opponents seemingly have the stronger legal argument.  I suspect that when these challenges come, the key votes will be Chief Justice John Roberts – who will certainly be at least as interested in preserving the Court’s putative standing within the Constitutional framework as the outcome of the case before the Court — and Associate Justice Amy Coney Barrett.  (There was a point at which I thought Associate Justice Neil Gorsuch was more judge than partisan, but that fleeting notion has passed.)

The types of activities that fit within these last three categories collectively amount to the decimation of the American state.  President Trump and Co-President Musk have over the years each made clear their respective affinity for Russian President Vladimir Putin.  These efforts couldn’t suit Putin’s purposes any better than if the Russian President had specified them himself.

CHIEFS, TOO

[DISCLAIMER:  In a rational world, it would be silly to add this, but in our current environment in which conspiracy theories spring from nowhere, I hereby declare that I do NOT think that the NFL is conspiring for the Chiefs or against the Eagles.  90% of the fictional memo set forth below wrote itself while I was on the treadmill yesterday.  Although the Kelce brothers and Ms. Swift will never be aware of this post, I am confident that if they were, they would not be offended by the tongue-in-cheek effort set forth here.]

Memo to:  NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell

From:  League Super Bowl Coordinator

In re:  Exploiting Revenue Opportunities Related to the Kansas City Chiefs

This year’s Super Bowl pits the World Champion Kansas City Chiefs against the Philadelphia Eagles.  The Eagles are an outstanding team.  The League, of course, has a vested interest in a Chiefs victory.  First, Taylor Swift is romantically involved with one of the Chiefs players, and we want to keep her fans happy so they continue to consume our product; second, and more importantly, the citizens of the states of Missouri and Kansas are both relatively much stauncher supporters of our new President, Donald Trump, than Pennsylvanians, so we want to keep Missourians and Kansans happy so that we can keep him happy.  The Chiefs are only about a 1.5 point favorite – coincidentally, about the margin by which Mr. Trump defeated Vice President Kamala Harris last November.  These are the steps we plan to put in place to ensure a Chiefs victory:

We’ve dispatched League officials to the Eagles’ offices on the pretext of performing an audit, told all the front office staff to go home, cut off their payment system, and locked them out of the Eagles’ network.

As you’re aware, Eagle Running Back Saquon Barkley has had an extraordinary season this year, running for over 2,000 yards.  Given Mr. Barkley’s obvious strategic value, the Chiefs are offering to buy Mr. Barkley.  Unfortunately, we haven’t yet had the time to set up a structure under which either the Eagles can be forced to sell Mr. Barkley to the Chiefs, or to enable the Chiefs to simply take Mr. Barkley.  Therefore, if Philadelphia ungratefully refuses to sell Mr. Barkley to the Chiefs, we have informed the Eagles that unless they pay at least 2% of their total revenue to the League, they will no longer get the coverage of the League’s TV package.

As you’re also aware, Ms. Swift’s boyfriend’s brother is a retired Eagle player who clearly loves and has provided tremendous support to the Philadelphia community over the years.  We are exploring ways to put pressure on him to say that despite what he has stood for throughout his entire professional football career, he never really liked Philadelphia or the Eagles, that he actually always thought that Kansas City and the Chiefs were the best, and that he wants to come back to play for the Chiefs.  Given the techniques we have seen successfully employed upon some of the President’s formerly most vociferous detractors who have since become among his most slavish supporters — such as Vice President J.D. Vance and Secretary of State Marco Rubio – we have high hopes here.

We have made arrangements to remove all security for the Eagles at their hotel and when entering the stadium.  They’re big boys; what could go wrong?  😉

We have fired every official who has ever made a call against the Chiefs.  We have fired every official who has ever made a call favoring Philadelphia.  We’ve fired every official who’s ever been to Philadelphia.

We are going to replace the National Anthem with the theme of God Bless America, but with better lyrics.  While still a work in progress, we envision a first verse along the lines, “God Bless the President, the man that we love; stand beside him, and prize him, through the night with the light from above,” while unfurling a flag at midfield with the President’s picture on it.  (We’re still considering how it might be received if we add a depiction of Jesus with his hand on Mr. Trump’s shoulder.)  It’ll be great.

Any player on either team seen kneeling during the … er … new National Anthem will be found during the coming offseason to have violated some League policy, and banned for life.  (Unless it’s Ms. Swift’s boyfriend; we need him, so we’ll simply reprimand him, with quiet apologies to the President.)

For the coin flip, we will be using a coin with the Chiefs and Eagles’ logos and the Lombardi Trophy all crammed on one side, and a flattering depiction of President Trump on the other side.  Of course, we will have commemorative bitcoins on sale during the game and thereafter, with proceeds split between the League and Trump Foundations.

As you are aware, for Super Bowls we normally display the name and colors of each team in one end zone.  We have decided to change the name of the end zone assigned to the Eagles to, “CHIEFS, TOO,” with the Kansas City colors.

We have added a rule change for the game:  the Official Pardon Power.  Any official that sees a Chiefs player guilty of a vicious unsportsmanlike hit on an Eagle has the power to immediately pardon the Chief.  The game will continue without penalty.

You have asked how we will deal with a distinct risk:  that despite all the safeguards we put in place, the Eagles are so good that they still … win.  We have opted for a simple course:  no matter how much the Eagles might win by, we will simply declare that Kansas City won.  We’ll immediately release the confetti with Kansas City colors.  Although Kansas City Coach Andy Reid, Chief Quarterback Patrick Mahomes, and Ms. Swift’s boyfriend will undoubtedly be shocked and wonder what is going on, we’ll simply haul them onto the victor’s podium (maybe he’ll propose to Ms. Swift on the platform — wouldn’t that be a coup?) and give them the Lombardi Trophy.  (You’re concerned that the Eagles might object.  Not to worry:  remember, we aren’t giving them any security.)

Am sure you’re looking forward to the event!  Since you’ll be presenting the trophy, you might want to consult Mr. Trump for his advice as to the best makeup!

[Enjoy the game.  Hopefully, it will provide you a worthy distraction. (FYI:  Travis Kelce hasn’t let me know whether he intends to propose to Ms. Swift if the Chiefs win.  😉 )]

Just Touching Base

I have entered little of substance here regarding the state of our polity for the last couple of months.  I have not resumed regular posts since Donald Trump reassumed the presidency, as I intended last November, partially because family issues have taken up a measure of our time, but also because … I am at a bit of a loss as to what to say.  Nothing that has occurred starting on January 20 could be any surprise to anyone with the sense God gave a goose.  Posts simply making points of which you’re already well aware, or saying, “What’dja think was gonna happen?” or “Toldja so,” will be tiresome.  I am beginning to put together a note that tries to place the Trump Administration’s types of activities into a framework – I do believe that there is a design behind them – but beyond that – and although more declarations regarding Trump malignity and Trump supporters’ states of mind will undoubtedly form the bases of a greater number of future posts than I now intend – I am pondering how to proceed with at least some future entries in a way that is constructive given the vile – albeit completely predictable – political devastation we are now witnessing.

That said:  one can remain confident that whatever is hereafter published in these pages will still be only so much Noise.  😉

Stay well – or at least as well as you can.